Sometimes, my head won’t stop thinking about something. My thoughts will spin around and around, not willing to let go, obsessing. It might be about another person, a big event coming up, or about myself. It might be overthinking a decision, big or small.

There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s a human thing to do, to overthink or obsess about something we’re worried or frustrated about. It’s a sign that I'm feeling fear and uncertainty, and my brains is trying to solve it.

Sometimes, though, it can be liberating to let go of that kind of thinking. It can lead to better sleep, peace of mind, and a simplicity of living. So how do I do that?

• Notice. Often when I'm caught up in a loop or overthinking, I'm not aware of it. It seems like the right thing to do, to keep thinking about this thing that’s worrying me. But to break out of the loop, I have to notice I'm in it. What signs have I noticed will point out to me that I'm in a loop? For me, it’s a rising amount of anxiety or worry, an inability to sleep, an inability to focus.
• Turn toward the underlying fear. Once I’ve noticed, the magic trick is to look beyond the thing you think needs to be solved … to the fear underneath. It’s like not looking at the hand the magician is trying to direct my attention to, but to their other hand that is hiding the coin. Don’t look at the object of my thoughts or the problem I need to solve … but the fear that’s having me want to obsess and overthink. What am I feeling right now, in my body?
• Be with the fear. Before I let go of the overthinking, I have to be with the feeling of fear that’s in my body. Otherwise it’s like trying to calm a freaked out child by ignoring them. What if instead I could be with the fear and relax with it, so it can relax? Can I feel the fear, as sensation, and stay with it? Can I breathe deeply and slowly, so I can slow your heartbeat and relax with the fear? Can I bring curiosity towards it? If it’s challenging, I might think of it as being with your heart.
• Ask what’s needed. Ask what my fear could use right now — some compassion, some music, a nice cup of tea, journaling or a walk? Then ask what’s needed in the situation I'm overthinking — what’s the simplest thing that you could do here, what’s the simplest way I could speak from the heart? Then trust that, breathe, and move to the present moment.
• Turn toward something right in front of me. What’s something right in front of me that you could focus on? It might be the light in the room, nature, another person. Or it might be answering an email or drawing. Something simple, right in front of me. I trust that what I’ve chosen from the heart will suffice, and then I focus on something in the here and now.

I still get caught up in loops all the time. But I accept that as a part of my humanity, and love the fear that’s creating it. Then I practice.